Thursday, January 19, 2012

WOW 2012 ALREADY.

Hi , IM BACK AFTER SO FUCKING LONG.
Pls try not to read my past posts cos i find them ZZZ =.=
actually I just need a space for me to fill up in case I store too much inside. lol.
It's a cold cold day , freezing in school. Feeling weird at the same time.
Sometimes I wonder, is it a good or bad thing to know the truth ?
the truth always hurts, but, is it better to know or be kept in the dark and find out only later ?
I'm a crazy paranoid insecure person,i admit.
And i always dig out information which isn't nice to know, but i still go and dig.
ITCHY HANDS LA. then everytime I find out sth , I feel confused. confused of what to do next.
Sometimes I scold myself for being sucha stalker or kpo. lol but thats me.


Right now i feel like im in my own world , blogging after so long,starving .
Talking about starving, Im extremely conscious of my looks and how people view me,
im not perfect. But im trying very hard !
Imagine an ugly fat bitch in secondary school lol.
When people comment about my outer appearance,i feel hurt somehow idk why .

I feel so useless ,financial accounting today, i thought i understand, end up im stumped when questions were thrown to me. I really dont wanna think about whether i will retake module anot,i deserve it somehow, but i guess im slow when it comes to math stuff.
Whats worse,i feel that i dont help other people as much as other people do, i havent achieved anything big in my life, I havent really helped someone ALOT, never done so many things.
Im a selfish,self centered asshole.
Im always so protective of myself , im always doubting everyone. I always think people do sth for a motive.

I think even when i die, nobody cries for me cos i deserve it.